


Fulgrim, Phoenix in Flames

by Etheryel



Category: Horus Heresy - Various Authors, Warhammer 40.000, Warhammer 40k (Novels) - Various Authors
Genre: Implied Relationships, Implied Sexual Content, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Multi
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-12
Updated: 2021-01-12
Packaged: 2021-03-03 03:33:32
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,946
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24458260
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Etheryel/pseuds/Etheryel
Summary: Long ago, once the Unification finished, the Mothers of Legion spread the light out on Terra and its nearby domains.These twenty women, chosen by Malcador the Sigilite, were brilliant and special human beings that mostly came from ancient aristocratic families that had fought with or even opposed to the Emperor. Like the Envoys of Humanity, Mothers duty was twofold: they had to the ensure Imperial Truth across the galaxy and protect their loyal Legions from corruption before (and after) their Primarchs were found.This is the case of Astra Dufour, Light of Terra and Flame of Fulgrim, the Phoenix. After several decades being the Mother of the Emperor Children, Astra found Fulgrim on Chemos and gave him the main lead of the Legion. They soon fell in love with each other.Now, two years after Ullanor´s Triumph and Horus appointment as the Warmaster, the Emperor Children have been separated from the Luna Wolves in order to reach their own glory. They soon find Laeran, an oceanic planet which Fulgrim decides to attack regardless Terra´s desires.You might know how the story goes after this, but I promise you it will be different.Looks can be deceiving, and sometimes, love is the end of duty.
Relationships: Corvus Corax/Original Female Character(s), Ferrus Manus/Original Female Character(s), Fulgrim/Original Female Character(s), Horus/Original Female Character(s), Sanguinius/Original Female Character(s), Vulkan He'Stan/Original Female Character(s)
Comments: 4
Kudos: 11





	Fulgrim, Phoenix in Flames

**Author's Note:**

> Mothers ARE NOT female Astartes, btw. They are the result of another Engineering-Program (like the Custodes), more refined and made for a woman’s body thanks to Alivia Sureka´s DNA. Since Malcador suggested him to make some Primarchs female, I thought this wouldn’t be impossible in terms of lore.
> 
> Hope you like it <3

M31, _Pride of the Emperor_

28th Expeditionary Fleet

Istvaan V

Dependencies of Douglas Rem, Mother's Personal Remembrancer

Sitting in a cushioned cloth armchair, Douglas Rem remains silent. Trying to stay calm, he closes his eyes and exhales, slowly letting the air out. A metallic tinkle flows into his ears. Outside, at the other side of the door, far beyond the secure walls of his quarters, a crazy, hysterical laughter bursts out from a woman’s lips. Her hurried footsteps fill every inch of the corridor, accompanied by a deep, almost inhuman voice. 

Still two days ahead of the Maraviglia's premiere.

Nervously, Rem opens his left hand; there, resting peacefully on his worn skin, it lays his last hope: a small crystal onyx which contains enough arsenic that shall stop his heart before Julius comes to him. His time is limited. Once the Maraviglia ends, the Emperor Children will have plunged into a dark path from which they will never wish or be able to escape. They have lost that eternal fight between desire and purpose.

« _I've given my life for this Empire_ » he thinks, putting the tiny onyx on the desk. When he nails his pen to the paper, a drop of black ink slips off the tip and leaves a dark spot on the surface. He looks up and smiles, his eyes wet. In the mirror, an aged face covered by a careless beard smiles back at him. Time has no mercy with mortals. « _I've given my life for you, my beloved Emperor_ ». And he would do it again, over and over again.

_«I guess my fight has ended»._

_"_ _I am Douglas Rem, personal remembrancer of Astra Dufour, Light of Terra, Flame of the Phoenix and Mother of the Emperor Children_ _”_ _,_ he writes. _“_ _And in little more than two days, I will die."_

 _"_ _Before that happens, I have decided to defend the honour of the Mother as best I can, for I am sure that history will bury her like a heretic, lustful and evil woman that did not deserve the power she was given. And that’s true_ _…_ _Partly true. Things are not that easy. My mind is still trying to understand what has happened._ _"_ He snorts and straightens his robe. He doesn’t want to be pitied. Whoever reads this last pleading should not feel sorry for him. _"By the time this volume falls into your hands, dear reader, Fulgrim will have already betrayed the Emperor._ _Astra's destiny will not be very different; what she did on Istvaan III has dragged her to an endless excess and decadence. She is not longer the woman I knew_ _"_ _._

_"_ _As fire precedes the rebirth of the phoenix, their deaths are linked to each other; Astra’s fall cannot be understood without the ending of Fulgrim’s path. The bond that unites them is strong as steel and corrosive as the most lethal of poisons. The love they once shared on Chemos has been perverted, disrupted, altered. It has become a cruel and frightening parody._ _”_

Tired, Rem stops writing for a moment. In the hallway, Podrick D'Hondt knocks on his room's door and urges him to come out. Rem holds back the impulse to look back and says nothing. He can't afford a single hint of weakness.

 _"In this testimony_ _,"_ he continues, _"_ _I will keep myself from making many references to Astra's human origins, for my time is limited, and her achievements as an Envoy of Humanity were already written down by my old and tired hands some years ago; if you wanna know where Astra comes from, just take a look at my previous books. Yes, yes_ _…_ _I may already be dead, but a writer never stops promoting his books._

_“_ _This will be, with no doubt, the most tedious and tiring work of my entire life._ _.._ _And even if I thought that I would not live to see the end of the Great Crusade, that I would be replaced by a younger and more ingenious writer after dying in my bed, here I am: rewriting my first and last novel while the galaxy burns into the flames of the Warmaster._

_"In short, this is the story of the fall of the Third Legion; the devastating and terrible path of the Phoenix and the Flame, two tragic and dark heroes bonded by a goal they both found common. Do not expect to find here, on these yellowish pages, the torrid narrative of a complicated and dark love. Fulgrim and Astra's relationship is just the first step on this chain of tragic and unpredictable misfortunes._

Rem takes a deep breath, taping his fingertips together. He knows that what he is going to say is kind of tricky, but he is not a liar. A half-truth is worse than a lie; what else could be the core objective of a professional like him? He still believes in the Imperial Truth, and he has never been a superstitious man, but there is a voice inside of him, a voice that hides deep into the darkest corners of his memory, telling him that, behind such excess and madness, there is… _Something_ else. Such a stupid idea makes him feel pretty embarrassed and leaves a strong, bitter taste of guilt in his mouth, but he cannot ignore this hunch. Not anymore. The evidence supports him. He is an imperial citizen, one of the first remembrancers to leave Terra, and, above all of that, a faithful servant of the Emperor. He doesn’t mind being taken for a fool.

_"I do_ _not know to what extent are they responsible for what has happened, but I find myself in the difficult position of clarifying that whatever their mistakes were, they cannot explain the entire disaster._ _Indeed, something dark and immeasurable has changed the destiny of this galaxy forever. Something inaccessible to the human mind that corrupts everything it touches, feeding on mortal flaws and sliding through the open wounds of a dying empire I never attributed any weakness to._

At that moment, Douglas covers his mouth with a white handkerchief and coughs profusely. His lungs hurt, drowning in pain and agony. He is getting too long. Outside, Podrick D'Hondt yells at him, his hands knocking rapidly on the door. If he doesn’t hurry, the boy will end up catching someone’s attention.

_"_ _But don't get me wrong. The responsibility is entirely ours; this is no god's business. This may seem a contradiction to what I just said. After all, how else could that dark and immeasurable presence be an absolutely inaccessible matter to the human mind? I don't... I don't_ _know, really_ _. It is becoming increasingly difficult for me to sort out my thoughts. But I know one thing: evil and lust are human traits, innate to mankind itself since its genesis in the Old Terra, and there is no god to blame for this. Violence is at the heart of our nature_ _._

_"As for_ _me, I wish there was something I could do to change the course of events. But I am old, and weak. I have always been weak. And I don't have much time left. Who would have thought that someone like me, a man so committed to the pursue of knowledge, could stoop so low?_

_"I'm_ _sorry, Astra. I have failed you. I have let you all down. This won’t bring me the redemption I crave for, but at least it will give me a peaceful death._

Exhausted, Douglas reclines on his seat and drops his pen, running a hand through his long grey hair. His wrist cries in pain. Outside, Podrick keeps screaming at him.

“Douglas Rem! I know you're alive, you piece of shit; the devil always looks after his own! Get your old ass out of there and come with me to _The Fenice_! Bequa is already setting it up for the last rehearsals! She wants to organize a big event before the Maraviglia takes place!” Elated, he kicks in the door and laughs. There is a slight slur to his speech. “Didn't Astra tell you? Oh, come on…! What did you do to piss her off?”

Douglas rests his head on the armchair. _«_ _Something terrible, Pod_ _»,_ he thinks. His lips start trembling. _«_ _I condemned you all_ _. I did nothing to stop this madness_ _»._

“Rem? Are you there?” Podrick brings his face closer to the door. His voice tone is so expressive that Rem can perfectly figure out that confused look upon his face. “Yes, yes. Of course, you are! I can hear your breath! Stop ignoring me and get out! Now! Something very big is coming! Do you really want to miss it?”

“I feel kind of sick, Pod. I think I have some fever. I need to rest.” He wipes the tears off his eyes with the sleeve of his tunic. “Do not worry about me, the Mother has given me permission not to attend this night's event.”

“Oh! I see. Do you want me to accompany you to the infirmary?” He doesn’t seem very convinced. “Maybe the apothecary Fabius could help you. It's been a while since you've had a medical check-up.”

Douglas approaches the door, inserts his fingerprint into the scanner and sticks his head out of the frame, gazing up to Podrick. His heart trembles, but his lips show a smile that almost seems sincere. Haggard and dirty, his blue eyes lighted up by whiskey, Podrick looks deplorable. Small scars paint his once attractive face. He smells of sweat and incense. « _Is he even aware that her sister is dead?_ _»,_ Douglas wonders. _«I doubt so»._

“No, my friend,” he says. “Leave me alone, I just need to rest a little more. Your screams brought me out from a beautiful dream. I will meet you later.”

Still not convinced, Podrick leans forward and puts his right hand on Rem's shoulder. His teeth are covered by a yellowish dirt that has blackened over the days. “Are you sure?”, he asks. Douglas covers the boy's hand with his and nods, making sure that his smile doesn’t fade from his lips. “You shouldn’t play with fire, Rem. You are too old.”

“And that makes me wiser than you.” He sends him away with a gesture. “Leave, please. It's just a cold. You don't have to worry about anything.”

Podrick steps back sharply and doubts, looking directly into his eyes, but finally nods and shrugs his shoulders. “The next time we meet, I will tell you in detail what happened this night!”, he says, and disappears down the hallway. Douglas doesn’t even have time to give him an answer. Soon, Pod's hurried footsteps fade into the distance.

Holding his breath, Douglas closes the door slowly. When he tilts his head back, his gaze meets the ceiling's flashing lights. A warm teardrop slides down his cheek.

_«There won’t be a next time, Pod»._

He wants to leave his quarters and beg the boy to stay away from the Fenice, but he knows it would be absolutely useless. He should have taken action months ago. Whatever happens this night, they are all condemned to die. Loyal soldiers have already been eliminated. It is only a matter of time before Podrick and him meet the same fate, for mortals like them have no right to live in the new Empire that Horus Lupercal wishes to build.

Douglas turns around and sits down again. He closes his eyes for a moment, hands clasped under his chin. As the personal remembrancer of the Light of Terra, he has a story to tell. The most important one, in fact. As epic and tragic as the Greek myths of the Old Terra.

He just needs to remember when it all started.


End file.
